just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
