I would go down on you faster than GM stock
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
