Do you still have your period?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
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