why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Rumble strips road head = magical
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
