i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
