Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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