"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
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