after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize