This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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