It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
