plz talk dirty to me
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
