i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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