How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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