Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
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