Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
