so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
