it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
