I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
