it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
