I'm gonna have a badass scar
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
