My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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