return my video game
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Randomize