Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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