i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize