I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
