I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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