i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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