so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
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