Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
