Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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