If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
