Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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