Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(661): View more from California

So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"

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(661): So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick" http://tfl.nu/zy8y

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(443): View more from Maryland

they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"

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(443): they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field" http://tfl.nu/je3y

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.

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(724): And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after. http://tfl.nu/p612

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...

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(978): guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out... http://tfl.nu/78da

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(513): View more from Ohio

did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness

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(513): did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness http://tfl.nu/hxgt

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(702): View more from Nevada

So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?

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(702): So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night? http://tfl.nu/xjy9

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(616): View more from Michigan

On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.

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(616): On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey. http://tfl.nu/p3t0

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(773): View more from Illinois

I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.

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(773): I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do. http://tfl.nu/ja9q

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(480): View more from Arizona

its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore

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(480): its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore http://tfl.nu/mq1v

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(641): View more from Iowa

I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.

(515): View more from Iowa

That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.

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(641): I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women. (515): That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage. http://tfl.nu/mozw

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(609): View more from New Jersey

There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.

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(609): There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now. http://tfl.nu/la5k

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(513): View more from Ohio

Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.

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(513): Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse. http://tfl.nu/2bnv

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(313): View more from Michigan

I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.

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(313): I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off. http://tfl.nu/tbu4

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

I just feel like everything is too perfect

(774): View more from Massachusetts

He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator

(774): View more from Massachusetts

Or both. Which is common

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(413): I just feel like everything is too perfect (774): He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator (774): Or both. Which is common http://tfl.nu/4u8t

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(310): View more from California

When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos

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(310): When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos http://tfl.nu/izqt

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