this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
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