Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
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