We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
one might say we're banned from that church
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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