Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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