Porn is love you can see.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I see more hoeing in ur future
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize