I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
