I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
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