"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
She needs sedatives and a leash
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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