The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
