I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
