My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
