I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
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Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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