Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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