This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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