Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
