just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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