what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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