Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
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He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
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What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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